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Pencil Extenders

Posted on October 25, 2017

When I was 8 I think (Standard 2 in Malaysia), I sat beside a girl in class. She was showing off her metallic pencil extender like it was the greatest thing ever.

For us kids at that time, it really was something special. In case you didn’t know what they are, pencil extenders are pencil holders for very short pencils, so that you can hold it properly and use it up as much as possible.

For some reason that girl lost her pencil extender that day. She cried and accused me for stealing it. I was flabbergasted of course because it never crossed my mind to take something that’s not mine, and that she could actually accuse me without evidence.

The teacher checked my bag and searched my pockets and found nothing, the girl wasn’t satisfied and kept saying I stole it. With the pencil extender nowhere to be found, the teacher separated us. I didn’t sit with that girl after that day and we never ever spoke a word to each other after that happened.

A couple of years later I moved to the same street as her and I moved away a few years down the road.

Knowing myself

Posted on July 6, 2015

The more people I meet, the lonelier I get.

Yet I am always happier after that.

I am relieved that connections made in the past can’t be broken so easily.

Happy to see people who impacted me in the past and yet at the same time know I might not meet them again.

Most importantly, I know myself a little better every time – and this means the world to me.

Never make someone a priority, if they only consider you an option

Posted on April 5, 2015

If someone wants you in their life, they’ll make room for you. You shouldn’t even have to fight for a spot.

Never, ever insist yourself to someone who continously overlooks your worth.

Value whoever values you.

When someone treats you like an option, help them narrow their choices by removing yourself from the equation.

Sometimes you have to try not to care because you can mean almost nothing to someone who means so much to you.

Don’t be a doormat. Don’t be a passing time candidate. Don’t be a tentative date. Don’t be a back up plan. Choose to be with someone who will treat you with the same respect and consideration you would show them.

Be with someone who finds time for you, not someone who finds excuses to not be with you or someone who’s only “interested” when they want something from you.

The hardest thing to do is letting go of someone who doesn’t want to give you the time and yet from the little time that you’ve spent together you know that you really like her but no matter what you do you still mean nothing to her.

Nothing hurts more than feeling strongly for someone but knowing that she don’t feel the same way you do and there is nothing you can do to change it.

Sometimes you have to give up on people. Not because you don’t care anymore, but because they don’t.

=(

This sucks.

#giveupisurrender #quotesgalore  #sheisjustnotthatintoyou  #truerwordsneverspoken  #theharshtruth #fadeaway

Fuck

Posted on February 7, 2015

You’re born with a ton of fucks to give, so you spend them like a kid with a credit card.
You give fucks about your friends, about your grades, about your fashion sense, about strangers’ opinions.
You give way too many fucks about way too many things, you have so many.

Then, as you get older, you have maybe 10 fucks per month, so you learn to budget them.
You allocate fucks to family and career, but there aren’t enough fucks left to give to the newest fads.
Oh, someone at work has something they need my help with that’s outside of my job title?
I’ll do my best to allocate some fucks, but this month is pretty tight.

Then, as you get even older, you’re down to 1-2 fucks a month, and those fucks are damn precious.
You give them to your family and your hobbies and your job, and that’s kinda it.
It’s not your fault – fucks expire too quickly.

I would’ve liked to save my fucks from when I was younger but I can’t. Then, you hit fuck insolvency.
You’re getting like one fuck a year, and you have to make it last.
So you go without, and even previously fuck-worthy things, you just can’t give a fuck.

Some people run out really quickly, some people have a fuck trust fund that pays out a decent amount even into old age. But at some point, the fuck faucet runs completely dry and you’re out of fucks to give.

It’s just basic fuckonomics.

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